This Just In!

BIG BABY JESUS IS DEAD!

I can't believe that a member of the Wu Tang Clan can die. That doesn't seem to fit their origins.

It seems so weird that just two days ago I was looking up my wu tang clan name. Where's my Wu Tang Collection...

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Also in the news, Dick Cheney was hospitalized today...or yesterday whenever. I'm not a damn journalist. I only know because I was flipping channels and I saw they had Lenard Maltin on CNN or something, talking about The Incredibles and how Beauty and the Beast was the first animated film nominated for an oscar...and they frickin cut out from this...to tell me that Dick Cheney was hospitalized.

LIKE I GIVE A SHIT. Fuck that bald bastard. It's not like his job is that important. You can interupt programing if he dies, but if he just is out of breath for a couple minutes, dont bother me with it. Boy watch me turn into someone exactly like him now. I always try to avoid calling people bald because I don't know if baldness is in my family or not. So, I hope not. I also am pretty high risk for heart problems...I'm not gonna worry about it right now.

This reminds me of when I was a little boy, watching fox kids on a saturday or something like that. Maybe it was right after school on a weekday...I don't recall. I do remember what I was watching. I was watching Tazmania. And what happens? They cut out of Tazmania to air the reading of the verdict for that guy who raped and killed Paulie Klass or whoever it was. First of all, I was a kid. This was a children's programming block. And they interupt it to go to a court trial. Just that is anoying. No kid wants to watch a boring (and believe you me, it was horribly boring) trial. They want to watch their cartoons! So I ended up watching the trial, hoping it'd be over so that I could find out the ending to my show. Each second that passed I was pissed off more and more. Then, they put the camera on this guy. This evil looking guy. Could have been totally in the camera, but he was found guilty...so he probably is pretty evil too. And then he looks at the camera...and flips the camera off! He's flipping of potentially thousands of kids in the greater bay area! What the hell! Do we need to see that stuff?

Then, as the days go by they show that footage on tv...and they put a mosaic over it. This is on the 10 o'clock news by the way. Aparently they're worried about offending adults with that double duce the bastard pulled, but they don't care to interupt children's programming with it and show it uncensored.

I don't live in the past that much though.

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What else is new?

Speaking about TV censorship, aparently ABC showed Saving Private Ryan the other day.

“ABC crossed the line by airing at least 20 ‘f’ words and 12 ‘s’ words during prime-time viewing hours!,” says the evangelical group American Family Association.

Oh my god. I didn't hear these bitches whining when they showed that 9/11 documentary about the fire-fighters.

And as for the film, I wasn't very impressed by it. It was a weak script. It had value in the D Day footage, but once they get off the beach it's all down hill. I think Speilberg payed too much attention to Normandy and not enough to the rest of the movie. That doesn't mean anything less for the movie, however.

But yeah. Watch it for that opening scene, if nothing else.

Conservative Christian groups, including the American Family Association, are also rallying against the new film Kinsey, released this weekend to critical acclaim, and starring Liam Neeson and Laura Linney.

The ideas in the film, directed by Oscar-winner Bill Condon who also made Gods And Monsters, promote pre-marital sex, which leads to abortion and Aids, claims the group Catholic Exchange.

OH MY GOD! THEY'RE FUCKING YOUNG! AND THEY'RE FUCKING! WE DON'T WANT THEM TO USE CONDOMS, SO THAT MEANS THEY'RE GETTING PREGNANT! AND THAT MEANS THEY'RE KILLING BABIES! AND WE NEED BABIES TO SURVIVE! WE NEED TO DRINK THE BLOOD OF THESE CHILDREN! THAT'S THE ONLY WAY WE'LL BE ABLE TO KEEP PUSHING OUR BIBLE ON THE MASSES!
NO MORE PRE-MARITAL SEX!

Man, I wish I could get some pre-marital sex. Sorry about the swearing.